±5%

Definitely doesn’t look quick enough to escape from a predator…

Maybe they weaned him wrong on purpose, as a joke survival tactic.

If you do it right, I think it summons a Kaiju.

I say we speed up the process and release a 37 part TikTok series on the health benefits of Geyser bathing.

Amateurs, compared to the G.O.A.T.

Ow… Ow… Ow…

After looking at where my views lie on the political spectrum, I have determined that I am an abomination.

https://www.marylandzoo.org/animal/chinese-alligator/

I went looking for pictures, and now I want one as a pet.

Poor people are “crack heads”, “junkies”, and “drunks”.

Rich people “have fun at parties”, “Suffer from opioid abuse disorder”, or are a “lush”…

Same shit, different tax bracket.